Da Night Befo X-Mas

Twas the night before Christmas and all through Dawg's House,
Everything was quiet, quiet as a mouse.

No one was stirring not a dog nor a cat,No phone calls were ringing "OH!!! My tire is flat".

Both Tire Pups were crashed out in their beds.

While Barbies and Bratz dolls danced in their heads.

Wifey beside me snoring as loud as an engine.

I heard a loud sound, maybe Wifey broke a piston.

So I jumped up to the window and what did I see?

Seven crew members and a Black Monte Carlo, numbered Three.

That beautiful site sat parked in my yard,

I had to look twice, I looked really hard.

The window net went down and what a surprise did I see???

A fat man with a beard was getting out of Dale's number Three.

I looked at that Chevy from it's nose to it's tires,

then I yelled out, HEY that's Chocolate Myers.

From a deep sleep Wifey awoke to this loud clatter,

she annoyingly yells what the hell is the matter???

"Look out the window" I replied as I ran down the hall,

tripping over Domino and busting my balls.

I brushed myself off and returned to my pace,

I would have given anything to see the look on my face.

As I opened the front door and looked out on my lawn,

no Chocolate or crew members , it was all gone.

I screamed and I yelled as I threw such a fit

At the top of my lungs" this is such bull shit"!!!

Where did they go, where is that Number Three???

I didn't realize by now ALL the neighbors were looking at me.

As I tried and I tried, I tried to 'splain.
Each and every one of them thought I was insane.
They pointed and laughed as they stood there and stared,

At the crazy Earnhardt fan, outside in only his underwear.

Merry Christmas,
Dawg